Today wasn't a great day.
As I type, I'm nursing a headache I've had for at least three hours now. I don't really feel hungry, but every time someone mentions food, I actually feel the vacancy in my stomach for a couple seconds. This evening, I yelled at my daughter for a minor infraction. I had to apologize to her later. I just feel cranky and tired.
Fasting is not a magic shield against life. It actually makes life more real, the good and the bad. It's like removing the tented lens you've always looked through. Sunsets are more beautiful and sacred. Traffic is more annoying.
I think we sometimes think God owes us something because we fast or do other acts of worship toward him. As if my fasting does anything for God. It does not benefit Him in any way. He does not owe me any special blessing or shield against trouble because I fast.
On the contrary, I owe God everything.
He provided the air I breath and the ground I walk on. He provided the water I drink. He gave me a family that loves and supports me. He saw fit that I should get in on the mystery that is Jesus, and be a part of Jesus' family. He has given me grace in so many situations, forgiving my trespasses, and giving me hope for the future.
As with any act of worship, I am not the center. Fasting is not about me. It doesn't really matter if I feel good about it, if I feel blessed. It only matters that I focus myself upon the One who deserves my attention, and through this worship, align my life to give a small token back to him. Fasting is a small token.
I am not more Godly because I fast. I fast because I am not more Godly.
As I type, I'm nursing a headache I've had for at least three hours now. I don't really feel hungry, but every time someone mentions food, I actually feel the vacancy in my stomach for a couple seconds. This evening, I yelled at my daughter for a minor infraction. I had to apologize to her later. I just feel cranky and tired.
Fasting is not a magic shield against life. It actually makes life more real, the good and the bad. It's like removing the tented lens you've always looked through. Sunsets are more beautiful and sacred. Traffic is more annoying.
I think we sometimes think God owes us something because we fast or do other acts of worship toward him. As if my fasting does anything for God. It does not benefit Him in any way. He does not owe me any special blessing or shield against trouble because I fast.
On the contrary, I owe God everything.
He provided the air I breath and the ground I walk on. He provided the water I drink. He gave me a family that loves and supports me. He saw fit that I should get in on the mystery that is Jesus, and be a part of Jesus' family. He has given me grace in so many situations, forgiving my trespasses, and giving me hope for the future.
As with any act of worship, I am not the center. Fasting is not about me. It doesn't really matter if I feel good about it, if I feel blessed. It only matters that I focus myself upon the One who deserves my attention, and through this worship, align my life to give a small token back to him. Fasting is a small token.
I am not more Godly because I fast. I fast because I am not more Godly.
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