Running to the Fire: An Eulogy for Ronnie Smith

On Dec 5, 2013 American teacher, Ronnie Smith 
was gunned down during his morning jog near his home in Benghazi, Libya, where he taught at an international school. He leaves behind a wife and a young son. He was 33 years old

I never met Ronnie, but we did have some friends in common. From what I've learned, Ronnie was a passionate follower of Jesus. He loved the people of Libya. His students and coworkers describe him as a dedicated teacher. He also saw his role as something more than just an educator. He was shining a light on a very dark place. He worked to bring the kingdom of God to everyone he met.

There are several similarities between Ronnie and me. Like Ronnie, I am 33 years old, the approximate age of Jesus when he died. Ronnie and I are both teachers. I also lived in the Middle East, teaching English. Like Ronnie, I am a father and a husband. Like Ronnie, I see my life as more than just doing this or that job. I live to shine light and speed the kingdom of God.

Unlike Ronnie, I have never lived in a really dangerous place. Although, I am sure my friends and family worried about me a lot, the Sultanate of Oman is a safe and peaceful country, with a crime rate much lower than the U.S. I was never threatened once in my two and a half years there. 

But Benghazi is different. What the heck was Ronnie doing there anyway? A review of recent history reminds us that Benghazi was home to the bloodiest battles of the uprising to overthrow former dictator, Muammar Qaddafi. Less than a year ago it was the site of a terror attack on a U.S. embassy. Benghazi is home to a number of radical Islamic groups, some with ties to Al Quaida. Benghazi is not a nice place to be. Everyone with half a brain is getting out of Benghazi. But not Ronnie. Ronnie was doing everything he could to get in.

Eventually someone will try to make a martyr of Ronnie. I doubt he would consider himself to be one. Although a dedicated follower of Jesus, his faith probably had nothing to do with his becoming the target of terror. It probably had more to do with his nationality and being in the wrong place at the wrong time. But it is no accident that Ronnie was in the wrong place at the wrong time.

Ronnie had learned what followers of Jesus have known for hundreds of years. Jesus did not run away when death was on the line. Neither do his followers. When there is a fire everyone runs to get away. Christ-followers run back to the fire to help others.

Ronnie is certainly not the first to run into the fire. There was a hermit named Telemachas who willingly entered the Roman Colosseum and stood between the gladiators, imploring them to put down their weapons and stop killing each other. His blood was the last spilled in the Colosseum. There were the five missionaries who decided to love the most brutal tribe in the Ecuadorian jungle. When attacked, Jim Elliot, Nate Saint, Ed McCully, Roger Youderian, and Pete Fleming did not return fire, but willingly gave up their lives. Then there are countless others who's names are lost to history. People who hid Jews, bandaged wounds, smuggled Bibles, entered war zones, leper colonies, and every dirty place imaginable, because Jesus led them there.

I am preparing to move to one of the more dangerous cities in America. Some of my friends and family are rightfully concerned. Although we will be living in a relatively safe neighborhood, it will still be a big step down from Joplin, MO. Detroit is no Benghazi, but it's no picnic either. I am well aware of the risks. I also, like Ronnie, know the reward of following Jesus even into the hard places.

"If there's any single person in the entire universe that you can take a chance on, it's God." Ronnie once said. Ronnie took that chance. Ronnie ran to the fire. Ronnie fought the fire. And in the end, Ronnie wins.

All Things in Moderation (Including Moderation)

I am moderate about nearly everything in my life. I am a moderate drinker. A glass of wine two or three times a week. I watch TV in moderation, maybe an hour a day. I exercise moderately, a couple times a week. I am politically moderate, neither too conservative nor too liberal. I give to causes I believe in, but never until it hurts. I get upset about injustice, but never protest it. I pray, but I don't often wrestle in prayer. I speak of Jesus, but usually not until someone else brings him up first.

From time to time, I dream of being a radical. It doesn't really matter what I would be radical about, just the thought of going all in for something gets me excited. I admire the lives of radical followers of Jesus that I have read about: Martin Luther King, Rich Mullins, and Shane Claiborne. But most of the true radicals will remain unknown to us. People who actually live out what they claim to believe, to the point of rejecting what most consider a normal life, often to the point of loosing their lives altogether.

I am reminded of Jesus, when he said you couldn't follow him unless you take up your cross. He said that the only way to keep your life is to give it up. C.S. Lewis put it another way "Christ says 'Give me all. I don't want so much of your time and so much of your money and so much of your work. I want you. I have not come to torment your natural self, but to kill it.'" That sounds radical. That also sounds painful. Which is why I've remained a moderate. I don't tolerate pain well.

But what has moderation done for us? Moderation makes us respectable.  Moderation leads to a longer life. Moderation keeps us from doing something that might endanger ourselves or our families.  Moderation lets us do good things, but makes sure we watch out for ourselves. It's not like we should trust God to take care of us. Moderation says don't go all in. Moderation keeps us from doing something fool-hearted like selling all our possessions and giving them to the poor. Moderation holds us back from doing something crazy like giving our lives in service to others.

Moderation tends to keep things just the way they are. Are you happy with the world?  If everything is perfect and looks to stay that way, then by all means, embrace moderation. I, however,  don't see the world that way.

I see a world that is radically broken. A leader uses chemical weapons in his own country. An abortionist murders babies after they are born. A child is beaten to death by his parents. Selfish living is on the rise. Hate takes on new forms, but continues to grow. The poor are exploited, children are sold, women are used. Moderately good living is powerless against such evil.

Radical is at odds with so much of my life. I like having it both ways. Going to church, doing my religious duties, then coming home and enjoying the comforts of American life. I don't want to be the guy that rocks the boat and makes everyone upset. I don't want to part with my possessions  I don't want to put myself in danger. But if following Jesus is inherently radical, then I have to figure out which is more important. To be moderate, or to have Jesus. To have a comfortable life or an abundant life.

My friend Lance recently had the opportunity to help out a homeless man, giving him a ride and helping him secure a place to stay. He told me he kept feeling convicted to do more for the man. Later Lance found out the man he was helping was a registered sex offender. "Does that change how you feel about wanting to do more?" I asked him

His answer: "That just makes me wish I had more compassion on him. Who else is going to reach out to him knowing that." That is so radically different than the way we usually approach helping others. I think my friend is starting to get it. Moderation will not change the world. Jesus did not play it safe. Moderation did not lead him to the cross. To follow Jesus, to love like he does, we need to start going easy on the moderation.